Out with the old...and in with the NEW YEAR!!

This is generally what happens when un-supervised adults attend New Year's Eve parties...

So this year, I must say that I am quite satisfied with putting my feet up on the couch and sipping on a quiet glass of chardonnay in front of the telly, whilst watching the Masterchef Australia Finale. You may think of this as boring, but I like to think of it as refinement - I have arrived at a stage in my life where I'm happy with my own company (and that of several cheeky felines and canines) and really couldn't be bothered to welcome another year into being with a monster hangover and numerous unidentified drinking injuries...

The dear Doc is on call this evening, so I have the house all to myself. Thus, my New Year's Eve celebratory dinner consisted of crackers with cheese and rocket (from the garden nogal...), leftover musaka-style homemade cottage pie, and merangues for pudding - not forgetting the mandatory glass of wine to accompany each course...of course! 

I suppose I should now reminisce about the year that is ending, and go on about how I look forward to the new year ahead and all that it promises. How predictable would that be?! Blah blah blah amazing year, blah blah unforgetable moments, yadda yadda yadda... *yawn* 

So, as this year winds down and you start to set all of your New Year's resolutions with gusto and determination (hope they all work out for you), I'd like to know from you, dear reader, which blog post has been the highlight of this humble blog for you in 2013? Knowing this will then be the highlight of my year and encourage me to blog more, and there would then be so much mutual benefaction going on that we will all be overcome with happiness and look forward to more enriching blogposts in 2014!

So spare a moment out of your boring New Year's Eve (it must be if you have nothing better to do than read this...) and make mine less boring!

Sending you all muchness of loveness wherever you are. May your glasses be full and your fridges empty, and may everything good and wonderful, and generally bloody marvelous happen to you in 2014!

Happy New Year xxxxx

I want to break free (Part 3, finale) - Blowing bubbles, Stone Town and Friends :)

So, having been completely convinced by our day of snorkelling, we decided that diving was going to be well worth the money spent, and thus we booked a days worth of diving at the in-hotel dive school Scuba Fish, and then spent Friday evening sipping our cocktails and perusing their fish library to see if there was anything exciting that we could expect to see the next day. A little word of warning to all you dive enthusiasts out there - Zanzibar diving is AMAZING, so expect to be disappointed wherever else you go after diving there....just kidding, but seriously, it's really that good...

The whole experience was completely different to anything we had ever done before. For starters, we did two dives in one trip, with a boat break in between, where we were served fresh island fruits and snacks on board. The crew at Scuba Fish are so professional and can even boast that they have a real Masai DM! Pretty cool... Also, due to the fact that we were in Zanzibar during low season meant that there were very few people diving. Hence, Dale and I had our own DM for the dives - a private Zanzibar undersea tour! Spectacular! I wish I could put up some video footage of all the little things we saw, but I'm afraid that I might bore you to death, as we have about 100GB of underwater footage! Here's a little snippit though, just to whet your appetite a little....

The amount of marine life is incredible, but the marine flora (corals etc) were what was really impressive! If you've dived in RSA you'll know that in a lot of places the reef has been damaged and there is often dead coral and seaweed littering the seabed. This is not the case where we dived. Sure, there is a bit in some places, but the majority of the reef is teaming with fish and corals - so beautiful!

Our DM was so great, pointing out all the rare treasures such as octopus, devil firefish, and even four leaf fish on one rock!  I could go on all day about the diving, but I will spare you dear reader, and just say that if you were thinking about doing your dive course and wondering where to do it, I can STRONGLY recommend Zanzibar! You will not regret the expense as I'm sure that you will find it a once-in-a-lifetime experience such as we did.

JFDI - you know you want to!

After an epic 4 hours on the water, we headed for dry land and wound our way back to the hotel via the back roads of northern Zanzibar on a rickety little bus, whilst chatting away to Frankie (the Masai DM) about his culture. Once again, the Scubafish staff were so chilled and easy to talk to, and really didn't mind answering all the typical tourist questions about their lives and culture. Once back at the hotel, we enjoyed a couples massage (yes please!) and then headed to the deck to sip on some MORE cocktails and plan the next day's activities - a trip into Stone Town and some souvenir shopping!

The next day we headed off to the Capital of Zanzibar in our own little private shuttle, where we met up with friends of ours who live there (I know... shame), Hugh and Megs. After a quick bite to eat, we took to the streets of Stone Town to explore the archways and narrow back alleys in search of coffee, Bao and other interesting exotic souvenirs. Fortunately for us we had a trump card - Megan speaks fluent Swahili, so bartering was a cinch! Watching her work was inspiring, whittling down prices and grabbing bargains left, right and centre! It was great! All this heavy bargaining quickly required a refreshments break, so we headed off to a hotel penthouse for some drinks (and beautiful aerial views of Stone Town) before making a trip to the Slave Church, and then the market, where we gathered up some fresh produce to take back to our hosts' place for some light dinner on the beach!

Sitting on the Dobree-Bell's back "lawn" watching the sunset, eating traditional Zanzibari snacks and drinking the local brew, we spent our last evening in Zanzibar contemplating our retirement to a remote tropical island one day... wouldn't that just be great?
 

I mean - who could complain about this view from your front lawn?!?!?!

 

Finally, after a full, fun day with the locals, we dragged our happily exhausted selves back to the hotel, and reluctantly prepared for an early morning departure. Our time in Zanzibar had come to an end...

What a magical place.

Dale and I were away for 7 nights - it might as well have been a whole month the way we actually felt when we got home. So relaxed and happy.

On our way to Pretoria from the airport the next day (Gautrain tourists, nerds), we met two young guys commuting home from work who summed up the experience beautifully. They took one look at us and said "you're THOSE people, aren't you?". We asked what they meant and they replied "you know, the guys that just do things, go places..." And our reply?

Why ever not??? What else are you working for?

Marvelous Mo-vember

Most women cringe when they hear the word "Movember". Visions of your man sporting a Tom Selek vibe, and that lovely red 'tache rash after kisses and cuddles, is not everyone's cup of tea... But I just have to say that I absolutely adore my man's mo every year, and I actually get quite sad when he shaves it off at the end of the month.

 

Its become a bit of a local tradition around here to get the guys together for a picture at the end of Movember. Last year's theme was the wild west (even the gals got in on the action), and this year they decided to go with the British army look. Personally, I think that Daalchie makes a very convincing dirty Mexican...rrrooooowwww....

 

 

All photos courtesy of Graham Rex Edmunds Photography (Copyright)

 

Adieu sweet Movember, until next year!

 

Have an idea for our next photoshoot? Let us know!

 

 

I want to break free (Part 2) - Holiday happenings...

There's nothing quite like waking up on a tropical island to make you feel like you are really on holiday! No cell phones, no email, no contact what so ever...a good way to start our break!
 

Hubby and I decided that our first day should be spent relaxing and exploring our hotel and beach. The one curse of being a dairy farmer is that it is physically impossible to sleep in anymore, so we were up and about by 6am, eager to get the day started! Of course, no-one else was up, so we had the whole place to ourselves before breakfast. Bliss.

 

When you look at postcards of Zanzibar, the first thought that crosses your mind is "photoshop". There's no way that the water is THAT blue and the sand is THAT white, right? Wrong. It really is. It feels like you are looking at the world with permanent Polaroid glasses on. The water is so clear its like a swimming pool, and the water temperature didn't get below 27degrees while we were there! It is quite spectacular, and all the fishing dhows and local fisherman with their nets and baskets make it so picturesque.

 

 

After a lovely beach stroll, we headed back to the hotel for a breakfast of the freshest, tastiest fruit in the world, Spanish omelets and fresh pineapple juice. The food in Zanzibar is so fresh and organic that you never feel uncomfortable after eating, and after a week of holiday, Dale and I had actually lost weight! Divine...

 

The rest of the day was spent doing typical tourist things, aka drinking cocktails and behaving badly. Being the social animals that we are, we were soon chatting away to other guests (all of whom were couples from RSA on honeymoon) and ended up corrupting a fun, young, newly wed couple into drinking with us. This inevitably led to a gin inspired glass-bottom boat expedition (where Dale and I almost sank in our titanic!) and a jolly time in the shallows, wallowing in the tropically warm water and exploring the local fishing dhows, followed by drinks in the Jacuzzi before dinner time. We had a terrible time I tell you....

 

So our first day was successfully spent winding down and forgetting all that work stuff. This meant that by day two, we were already feeling relaxed and excited to do some exploring around the island.

First up on the itinerary was a Spice Tour - a must do if you are planning on visiting Zanzibar. We got to see and taste nearly every spice you can think of - Ginger, Vanilla, Cardamon, Cloves, Nutmeg (pictured below), Pepper, Turmeric, Cinnamon, and an assortment of tropical fruits, coffees and perfumes! What an adventure!

 

And then it was back to the hotel for more relaxing and tropical cocktails.... where we convinced our recently acquired holiday buddies that they should definitely join us on a snorkel safari the next day. Being newbies to snorkeling, we were so excited for what was in store for them under the sea that we spent half the evening regaling tales of our undersea adventures - diving with sharks and turtles, getting engaged on Aliwal Shoal amidst a hurricane - thus further convincing them that it would be worth their while to join us. Who knows, maybe we could have the chance to swim with dolphins after all?

 

So, the next morning, bright and early, we all climbed into the hotel's dhow and headed off to Mnemba island atoll - the most beautiful place you have ever seen in your life. WARNING: If you are an avid fan of diving in RSA, do not go here - your life will never be the same again! You will never be able to dive in RSA again (yes, even Sodwana) without thinking "OMGee, this cant even compete with Zanzibar!"... The abundance of fish life on the reef is breath-taking. In water that is crystal clear and less than 2 metres deep in places, you will see trumpet fish, fire fish, scorpion and stone fish, emperor fish, giant starfish (cushions included!), leaf fish, octopus, pipefish, coachmen, and, and, and.... it's ridiculous! We took about a billion videos on the GoPro (watch this space...) and kept coming up every 10 mins to laugh at each other and exclaim "this is amazing!"

 

WOW.

 

And just as we though things couldn't get any better, the dolphins arrived. We had the opportunity to swim with dolphins in water that was so warm and clear that it felt like swimming in a pool, or an aquarium, and got so close to them that we could almost touch them. The photos below are some stills taken from the videos that we captured.

 

can. you. believe. this ?????

 

 

 We had been debating since we arrived in Zanzibar whether to fork out $125 each for a days worth of diving - lets just say that after this snorkel trip, nothing was going to stop us splurging a bit of our hard-earned moola on blowing some bubbles!

*to be continued*......

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I want to break free (Part 1) - Getting there

Everyone dreams of going to that tropical island one day. Where the sand is so white and powdery that it reminds you of baking powder,  and where the sea is the colour of sapphires and topaz, lapping at your feet at a constant temperature of 27 degrees Celsius year round... that place where you can lie in the shade of a coconut tree, sipping on cocktails all day long without a care in the world. Paradise.

 

Zanzibar is such a place - a tropical paradise.

 

The hubby and I both decided that this year we were going to spoil ourselves and spend a bit of moola on a luxurious, exotic holiday before we start thinking about expanding the Thomas empire. (Having kiddies is an expensive affair, and we were not about to go and spend all of our hard-earned money on little people before at least indulging in a little bit of fun ourselves!) We looked at all the typical island destinations - Thailand, Bali, Maldives, Seychelles, Mauritius - but finally decided that an all-inclusive package was the deal maker, and found ourselves booked up to jet of to the Spice Island and Freddie Mercury's birth place (true story) for a romantic, pre-children getaway for two!

 

So, a little over 2 weeks ago now, we hopped into Soobs and headed for the big city to catch our flight to Dar es Salaam. Driving in JHB is not for sissies, and I must say that two years of living the quiet rural farm life has turned both of us into serious country bumpkins in this regard! Wide eyed and completely drained, we finally made it to our overnight stop in one piece, a friends place in beautiful little spot just outside Pretoria called Die Akker. Who knew that you could find peace an tranquillity like this just minutes out of Pretoria CBD?! Regardless, we both battled to sleep that night in anticipation of the big trip the next day - needless to say, Africa was beckoning...

 

The classic country-bumpkins-in-the-big-city airport shot

I'm sure you have all been in an aeroplane before, so we can skip past the actual flight from JHB to Dar es Salaam, as that was pretty uneventful and not very exciting to write about. Maybe one random fact for you - there is a 1 hour time difference between Tanzania and South Africa, meaning that, although or flight was only 3.5 hours long, it appeared that we landed in Dar es Salaam an hour later than we should have, which inevitably confused the poor little Safas until someone pointed it out...

For anyone who hasn't been to an African airport before (not a South African one...that is very civilised in comparison), arriving in Dar es Salaam could be quite intimidating. There are no queues in passport control - only one very important looking Ghadaffi look-alike with a uniform on, who stands and looks at all the dazed and confused foreigners wandering around the customs area like a cloud of lost farts, before making some sort of indication that we should liaise with him if we want to gain entry into the country. One then has to slip $50 into your passports and pass them on to him, where he will then proceed to the nearest visa cubicle and proceed to deposit your passport at the bottom of a large pile. Luckily for us, we were close to the front, and were waved through quickly as South Africans no longer need visas to visit Tanzania. Once we had escaped customs, and proceeded through a rather dodgy looking luggage X-ray check, we found ourselves stepping out into a hot, humid, crowded courtyard, which is apparently the arrivals meet-and-greet area. Promptly, we proceeded to be accosted by several eager taxi drivers who took our bags from us and started heading in different directions! Retrieving our belongings, we made our way to a cubicle in the centre of the bedlam which purported to be the information desk for international arrivals, and found out that we needed to catch a lift to the departures terminal, which is in a completely different building about 2km down the main road! Talk about baptism by fire... so we got hopelessly ripped off and paid $20 to get to departures so that we could catch our connecting flight to Zanzibar.

Now, if you want to know how hot it was during all of this running about, imagine being in a sauna. The air there is so thick and sticky, and the temperature was about 37 degrees Celsius - it was like being in an oven - slow roasted Leechi and Daalchi... and not a breath of wind. Dar es Salaam domestic departures is literally a shed, our boarding passes were hand written, and the departures board was a white board with Velcro accessories! Very quaint, which I must admit, didn't help very much with the nerves, as I had never flown in a small plane before and was not looking forward to it at all! Oh, and don't expect western toilets ladies, the culture there caters mainly for the largely Islamic population. That one takes some getting used to...

Fortunately, we have friends who live in Zanzibar, and Hugh is actually a pilot for the airline that flew us across to Zanzibar. So he was kind enough to fly over on his day off to meet us and personally escort us to Zanzibar! What a treat! Dale enjoyed it thoroughly as he got to sit up front in the co-pilot's seat with a magnificent view as we flew out of Dar on our way to paradise.

Not such a bad way to travel, I must say! As soon as we had landed, we exchanged some info with Hugh (and a few luxury items brought across from RSA) before being whisked off to our Hotel on the North East coast at a place called Matemwe. The trip from Stone Town to Matemwe takes a good 45 minutes to an hour as the speed limit is 60km/h! So we sat back and enjoyed the view, encountering numerous scrawly looking cattle, Dala Dalas, rice paddies and verges covered with drying cloves.

Finally, at around 6pm Tanzanian time, we arrived at Azanzi, and retired exhausted to our welcoming, air-conditioned deluxe villa, complete with king size bed (with mozzie net to boot), as well as a gorgeous outside shower and a cold water Jacuzzi on our balcony! Not too shabby eh Nige? Being so hot and humid, we of course then made our way directly to the hotel bar for an ice cold beer and a Mojito, as one does on the first night of a holiday! Here we met with the hotel manager to plan our inclusive activities for the week, before indulging in a lovely traditional Swahili meal, and then flopping into bed, pleasantly exhausted from our travels, and looking forward to the adventure that lay ahead of us in the morning - exploring this gorgeous tropical paradise!

*To be continued......*









 

 

 

 

 

 

The most awesomest weekend since forever

You all must have experienced one of THOSE weekends...one that is so desperately overdue and just sneaks up and becomes the most epic weekend of the year. This last weekend was exactly that - an adventuresome getaway with an awesome couple to one of the most beautiful places in South Africa - a reminder of how amazingly blessed we are to live in such a diverse country.

 

For those of you who have visited Sodwana Bay before, you will know that the park consists of a very large campsite (over 200 stands), and as die-hard camping fanatics, we usually book one of these and set up camp for the weekend. However, as we had friends joining us from Cape Town, it wasn't going to be very practical for them to fly up with camping gear. So we opted to stay in Coral Divers - a diving school that is situated within the campsite itself and offers a variety of accommodation from rustic permanent tents to luxurious en-suite cabins. What a pleasure.

 

We arrived late on Friday night,  armed with a pack of lamb chops and a bottle of GOOD red wine. The fires in their lapa area were already on the go (you can self cater or book meals with them) which led to a hassle free, relaxed dinner with heaps of catching up - and Hendrik and Lindie welcoming a beautiful new nephew into the world! Then it was off to our tented camp for a good nights rest in anticipation of diving our nuts off the next day... even the camper in me was a little relieved that we didn't have to put up a tent! Their permanent canvas tents are pitched under a roof and have two single beds that are super comfortable. Everything the dive fanatic needs really - a place to put your head at the end of the day!

 

Saturday's 5am wake up call came in the form of several tractors rumbling off to load up the dive gear and head to the beach. There is absolutely no chance of a sleep in, but when you're there to dive, that's the point is it not? Armed with our new GoPro (fancy b'day prezzy from the hubby), we headed off to the beach, where Dale was promptly allocated GoPro duty as I was sure that I would drop it into the sea and never see it again!

 

You will not believe the clarity of the photos and videos you can get on a GoPro - we were both blown away. It's so exciting to finally have something that we can use to show people how amazing the underwater world is... After a fun dive, we headed back to camp to smash some breakfast into our faces. All you can eat, full breakfast buffet, for ninety bucks! Win! And after that, wallowed around like beached whales on the sundeck whilst the boys went off for a kite surf and introduced the GoPro to another adventure sport. Tough life I tell you...

 

 

To cut a long story short, the rest of the weekend included:

 

* Sharks beating Province in the Currie Cup (woop woop!!)

* The most epic dive ever - Raggie shark, Loggerhead and Green Turtles, schools of king fish, and a DM who had to wear a froggie mask because his team lost the rugby :) - all on GoPro!

* Magnum ice-creams to avoid becoming Hangry - so hungry that you get angry.

* Pygmy kingfisher, herds of Rhino, a bull elephant in musth, and a Kamakazi bird that has the most insane call ever, all in Hluhluwe Game Reserve.

 

 

Who would have thought you could cram so much into 2 days???

 

Now I really can't wait until Monday next week....a whole week of sun, sea and sand! Zanzibar, here we come!!

 

 

 

The big three-OH

Thirty. Dertig. Dreißig.

In 'The Myth of Sisyphus' the French existentialist Albert Camus comments that the age of thirty is a crucial period in the life of a man (or woman, in this instance) for at that age he (or she) gains a new awareness of the meaning of time.

Time.

Turning thirty means that I have lived on this earth for 10957.3 days. It also means that, if I make it to 80, then I only have 18262.1 days left to do everything that I want to do in my life, and that I have 3652.4 days left until I reach middle age...so my mid-life crisis is not as far away as I thought!10957.3 days is a long time. Which got me thinking about what I have learnt over all those years. If I could travel back in time, what would I choon my 18 year old self? Probably something along the lines of "where on earth did you get your dress sense" or "it must be so nice being so carefree" - who do I sound like right now?!?! Some crazy grown up person...

I came up with a few things that I have learnt in my life so far. Inconvenient truths according to leechipip. Personally, I think many of them are pretty damn profound, whilst others are just a bit silly. Anyhoo, 30 years is a long time to accumulate all this wisdom, so I hope that some of it rings true to you. Happy birthday to me xxx

* Happiness comes from loving yourself and having respect for others, which in return will lead to success. The happier you are, the more successful you'll become - and never measure your success against someone else's. Your successes in life are unique - comparing yourself to other people is just stupid.

* True friends are those who have seen you at your worst and still love you for who you are. They never expect you to conform and will always be around when you need them the most.

* There is no place in life for rude people. You can achieve anything you wish to without having to resort to rudeness. That also goes for bitchiness, snobbiness, and being condescending.

* No matter how old you get, your parents are, and always will be, right about everything. Trust me.

* TV/Playstation/Computer Games are the biggest waste of time on this planet. Go outside and enjoy life the good old-fashioned way, like you used to as a kid. That evil little box is stealing your precious time. No-one ever lay on their death bed and said "oh, how I wish I had watched more TV..."

* Don't waste your time trying to consume copious amounts of revolting spirit liquor in an attempt to get completely knackered so that you can socialise with other completely knackered people. Rather spend your energy and time on tasting and appreciating wine. It really is glorious, and will serve you well later on in life when you become all sophisticated and have to attend dinner parties and fancy weddings and stuff...plus, its actually good for your heart - win!

* Look after your body - you only get one and you cannot trade it in for a new one when you get old and buggered. A little bit of exercise never killed anyone...

* Do not rely on other people as much as you rely on yourself. It doesn't hurt as badly when you disappoint yourself, but it feels horrible when you put your trust in someone else and they let you down. Be true to yourself.

* Friends can be fickle, but family is forever. Be good to your family - they are always there, through good and bad.

* Toast will ALWAYS fall onto the buttered/jammed side if you drop it.

 

* Hangovers get harder to deal with the older you get.

 

* If people don't like you or what you stand for, that's their problem, not yours. Not everyone has to like you and you don't have to please everyone all the time. Saying no every once in a while is allowed.

 

* Enjoy the irresponsibility and poverty of youth - once you have a job and enough money to jol, you have zero time and way too many commitments. Growing up is seriously overrated.

 

* Save. Save. Save. The earlier you start, the better! Plus, poor old people are really depressing. Its also motivation for that day when you can piss off into the world, leaving your well educated and successful children behind, and travel to all those cool places with all the money you get back when your RA pays out.

 

* Have an opinion - and stick to it. If you like the Blue Bulls, then like the Blue Bulls - even though the rest of the world thinks they're a bunch of twats...good for you.

 

* Never stop learning. Do something new that excites and inspires you every day.

 

* Puppies, kittens, babies, etc. all grow up. If you're not prepared to look after them when they're all grown up, eating you out of house and home, and requiring daily exercise/entertainment/schooling - don't get/have one.

 

* Drunk driving is dumb. Your life is worth more than one good party.

 

* If you're going to shoot an animal for sport, you should be prepared to eat it.

 

*Sun-cream. Nuff said.

 

* Weddings are the coolest parties EVER.

 

* Don't take life too seriously. Laugh at yourself. I do all the time...

 

-the end-

 

 

 

 

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”
― Oscar Wilde 

 

 



10 reasons why I'm glad I'm not a dairy cow...

1) Electric fences. They really suck.

2) In order to stay alive and productive, you have to be pregnant and/or lactating - all the time. And when you stop getting pregnant and/or lactating, you become someone's lasagne...not even something great like someone's steak or carpaccio - nope, lasagne. Or spaghetti bolognaise. Either way, it's not a great tribute to your existence.

3) Having your nipples tugged on twice a day - for 80% of your life - cannot feel great. No matter how you look at it.

4) Having an arsehole directly above your va-jay-jay, when you walk on all fours, is not ideal...

5) The "choice" of a staple diet of grass, meal and chopped up mielies that have rotted and been stored in a clay pit. Mmmm...yummy!

6) Having boobs that hang between your back legs, which can therefore dangle in the mud or get caught on brambles and low branches - who thought of that one???

7) Never being able to drink milk, eat icecream, or smear mountains of butter onto your toast because that would just be cannibalism or something...

8) Having no option but to be black and white - no cool accessories, no colours, no mix and match, and just forget about that tan - black and white.

9) Living outdoors, come rain or shine - or snow.

 And finally...

10) Artificial insemination - where's the fun in that???

Have a great week peeps....and be grateful you're not a dairy cow! XxX

Mall Mayhem

The Southward equinox is the moment in the year when the sun crosses the celestial equator, heading southward. This vernal/spring equinox can occur at any time from the 22nd to the 24th day of September. At the equinox, the sun rises directly in the east and sets directly in the west. Before the Southward equinox, the sun rises and sets more and more to the north, and afterwards, it rises and sets more and more to the south.(source)

Why am I telling you this? For the simple reason that, for me, the vernal equinox is the REAL first day of Spring.  It means that the days are getting longer, and the nights are getting shorter; that temperatures are going to start hitting the twenties on a daily basis; and that Winter is finally behind us.

So why, oh why, on god's green earth, would you spend this day in the Mall?????

I loathe the mall. I try to avoid going there as much as I can, but sometimes (as was the case this weekend) I have to make a trip. And when I do, I ensure that it is no longer than 1 to 2 hours of frenzied, sonic-the-hedgehog style grabbing and exiting at warp speed. In simple terms: I mission. And if there's one thing a person on a mission cannot stand, it's mall rats. Those mall frequenters who amble along the corridors, blocking your escape and thwarting every effort to overtake them by crab walking into your line of attack.

There are several very distinct types of mall trolls that you will inevitably encounter on a visit to the mall, and I have no doubt that many of you are already all too familiar with them...

The roamer: a person who appears to have no known purpose whatsoever, who is just aimlessly weaving from side to side, and will suddenly change direction with no warning, normally resulting in a clash of bodies and the spillage of groceries.

The shuffler: you have to look really closely to notice that this person is in fact moving forward, albeit at an excruciatingly slow pace, normally blabbing away on their cellphone completely unaware of your exasperated attempts to move past them.

The waddler: The plus-sized behemoth that seems to gyrate from side to side like a large boiled egg, and will no doubt have a partner/friend just as plus-sized who must walk alongside - thus ensuring complete domination of the corridor.

The stalker: a sneaky little bastard who tails you through the entire mall to take advantage of the path clearing skills you possess, thus ensuring that they travel comfortably whilst you take on all the congestion.

The blocker: there is always one mall rat who will not move out of your way, even though they can see you coming. As you go to overtake a group of waddlers, they will be coming in the opposite direction with as much intent as you have not to stray from their course.

The lingerer: normally lingerers hang out in packs, and are usually females between the ages of 13-16. These gaggles of giggling gerties will stand in groups just outside store entrances, therefore not only blocking the flow of traffic, but also hindering entrance to stores.

The trollie patrollie: a very common sight in the mall are the breeders. These yummy mummies inevitably have a trolley filled to the max with groceries, a toddler in the trolley seat, and one or two other kids hanging off the sides...and they also travel in packs. While the kids are darting in and out of traffic, these mummies yack away with each other and take up the entire corridor.

And finally, the marketer: that annoying guy that has a corridor stand in the middle of the mall, who attacks you with some promotion on hand-held back massagers or revolutionary new anti-aging potions - if I wanted your product, I would go to a shop and buy it.

My solution to all this madness?

Find the loudest, most buggered up looking trolley (the one with the wonky wheel that looks like it wants to escape the mall as much as you do), and head down the middle of the corridor with serious intent. This is a sure way to part the traffic, as people will hear you coming, look around at your contraption of doom, and part like the red sea. Guaranteed.

So happy shopping to all you mall rats out there - I prefer to grow my own and only venture into the dark depths of consumerism when absolutely necessary, and preferably when the weather is shite and the rest of you all stay at home.

Happy National Heritage day all xxx

September 2013 - Happy 1st anniversary Karkloof Farm!

 

September 2012 - A year ago

 

September 2013 - Same place, different time - Crazy how time flies!

 



Inelegantly, and without my consent, time passed

I don't know how people manage to write and publish a blog post every day...they must literally have nothing better to do, or otherwise be super-organised-time-management-gurus, because these things take time!! I started this post on Sunday afternoon, and I've only just managed to finish it now! Farming does that - you think you have some time off and then all systems fail and you run around like a headless chicken for two days... But finally things seem to have stabilised so that I can complete my weekend ramblings. Hence the context of this post is now two days old, but necessary none the less. Enjoy.

 

Sunday 15 September 2013

 

Sundays....the week just wouldn't be the same without them! Of course,  I was on duty this weekend on the farm, so there had to be some deviously clever bovines about intent on spoiling my day of rest. .. and voila! There they were at 6:30am frolicking all over the farm, enjoying their new found freedom, and reeking havoc on my plans for the day (not to mention a few fences as well). But - this time i was prepared for the sneaky little she-devils as i still had the dairy boys at hand to round them up. So I (managerially) made it their problem as I trotted off to finish my pasture walk with my furry little canine friend, Frankie - nothing quite like a good 5km walk measuring grass growth to get the heart pumping on a Sunday morning!

 

It was around about the middle of the third pivot circle that i realised that today is September 15th... would you believe that it has actually been a whole year since the hubby and I moved onto the new farm? 365 days to be exact - or if you'd prefer - 8760 hours, 525600 minutes, or 31536000 seconds...

 

So much has happened over the past year that I though I must, of course, summarise it all in a lengthy blog post! A fabulous photo journal of key events that have transpired over the last year, to keep you enthralled for a couple of minutes before you start/end your day at the office! Enjoy!

 

 24 September 2012

 

 

A panoramic view of Karkloof farm from our neighbour's hill. Note all of the trees on the right hand side of the picture...

 

4 - 13 October 2012

 

Out with the old... and in with the new! A much needed 4x4 vehicle for those dodgy farm roads!

 

 

November 2012

 

The view from our front veranda.

 

 

12 - 15 December 2012

 

Dale turns 30! And the bestest (yes its a word...) friends and family celebrate together xxx

 

 

And Didee and Il-dog get engaged!! Woop woop!

 

 

 

January 2013

 

The start of a new year - and the start of new things on Karkloof farm! Our first group of heifers move down to graze on the abundant Kikuyu, and work begins on the Stables.

 

 

Not to mention the coolest people in the world come to visit for a special wedding....

 

February 2013

 

A big bump turns into a little person....

 

 

....Frankie comes to live at Karkloof...

 

 

...and another Midmar Mile is completed by a feisty Cork's Crew!

 

 

2 March 2013

 

We bade farewell to Dale's silver bullet - stolen and presumably taken across the border into Zimbabwe or Mozambique. Our first taste of Africa Tax!

 

 

April 2013

 

"Training" for the Imfolozi MTB challenge begins - note the trees top right, same ones from the first picture, which are now felled.

 

 

And a lovely weekend getaway to Sodwana Bay for some diving and general merriment - and also just an excuse to escape the cold!

 

6 May 2013

 

The first sign of winter - our first frost at Karkloof farm....brrrr!

 

 

June 2013

 

Dale's parents come up to visit from the Cape - and make their first trip up Sani Pass!

 

 

20-21 July 2013

 

Dale and I complete the Imfolozi MTB Challenge (check out the post here) - one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life! Never felt so proud to finish something like this - once in a lifetime achievement!

 

 

August 2013

 

We welcome our newest additions to the menagerie - Tawny Eagle (AKA Tawny) and Aiden's Lady (AKA AL). (See blog post Bucket List).

 

And FINALLY....

 

September 2013

 

You'll have to stay tuned for the next instalment!