I have decided that 2020 is my year of "No".
The year of letting go of the guilt associated with saying "No" and just accepting that life is too short to try and please everyone. This year, I'm all about pleasing myself - get your mind out of the gutter please - and embracing peace of mind knowing that I can be happy without having to keep everyone else happy at the same time.
I'm going to say "No" to other peoples' drama. There is nothing worse than being sucked into someone else's soap opera, where everyday brings a new drama and histrionics aimed at drawing attention and illiciting sympathy. Done. I'll get my fill of drama from Netflix on a Saturday night, thank you.
It's a big "No" to negativity in all of its sly forms. If you have something negative to say, go ahead and say it, but I won't engage with you or agree with you. This goes for negative actions and energy too - I am so done with negative people.What is the point of finding something wrong every day? Let it go, be positive even when things look bleak - attitude is an amazing game changer... I always try to see the positive in any situation, and it makes a big difference in how one reacts to and deals with problems. Getting negative, angry and grumpy never achieves anything positive, it only brings down others around you too.
There will be a few "Yes"s among all of these definitive refusals, the most important one being - me. You may feel that this is quite vain or selfish, but quite honestly, I don't care what you think. And please don't take that the wrong way, because it's not about you, but rather, about me and the way I view and respect myself.
I've neglected the most important person in my life, and it's time to reconnect with her and find that carefree, whimsical person that is hidden somewhere under the "mom" facade. I've taken up and been loving my yoga as it gives me time to reflect on my personal strength and goals and to refocus my energy into the right places. Of course, this only happens when I'm not being used as a jungle gym by my two children....
I've also taken up running - yes, you heard right, I'm actually running. And surprisingly enough, thoroughly enjoying it! It has become a bit of an addiction at the moment, and luckily we are so spoiled for options out in the country, so it hasn't got boring yet! A group of us have entered a two day stage race happening in May (or supposed to be...), and having that goal to work towards has been extremely rewarding. Getting and staying running fit is hard, much harder than swimming for me, but I feel so energized and proud of myself after every outing that it is slowly becoming addictive. I'm also feeling the most positive about my body for the first time since having children, and that is doing wonders for my self-esteem. It feels great to just disconnect from life and engage with nature and myself.
So, even with all the uncertainty and fear around the current Covid-19 Pandemic, I find myself strangely optimistic about life. This global disaster has brought out several positive reactions in humanity; we are appreciating our health and working harder at staying healthy, appreciating our time together as a family, and looking out for and caring for others who are more vulnerable than ourselves. Our country has been so positive in their approach to combatting the virus that I find myself so proud of my fellow South Africans and positive that we will come out of this as better people when it is all over.
Therefore - Away with you negativity. You are a useless and damaging emotion, I hereby expunge you from my life with immediate effect.
Love and light to you all. Stay strong and healthy, and stay the F*ck at home...
